From Home to Habit

Alcoholism runs in my family. It’s the skeleton in the closet no one wants to acknowledge, even though its presence is undeniable. Growing up, I witnessed the havoc it wreaked, the destruction it caused, and the pain it left in its wake. My childhood was marked by moments of fear and confusion, seared into my memory. I remember the night my mother was screaming for me to call 911 while her drunken boyfriend abused her. I was just 11. There was also the time my grandma and I had to pick my mom up from the middle of the road in the dead of night. These experiences etched trauma into my young mind, and alcohol was at the root of it all

I remember specific family members who, while drunk, would make me feel incredibly uncomfortable. These were people I loved and trusted, yet their behavior changed dramatically under the influence of alcohol. I learned to expect and endure their inappropriate actions whenever they went out drinking and returned home intoxicated. There was a sense of dread every time they left, knowing what might happen when they came back. One particularly disturbing memory is of a family member who would come home from the bar late at night while I was watching TV on the couch. He’d stumble in, see me there, and then lie on top of me—nothing sexual, but it made me feel extremely uneasy. I dreaded the sound of his footsteps on the porch stairs and the door opening. In an attempt to avoid the uncomfortable interaction, I would quickly shut my eyes and pretend to be asleep, hoping he would leave me alone.

From Subtle Beginnings to Overwhelming Frequency

I never thought I’d become an alcoholic myself. It started slowly, almost imperceptibly. After turning 21, I drank occasionally but never enjoyed it much. It was just something to do. My husband and I would drink while watching our favorite TV show, “Game of Thrones.” It seemed harmless enough, something we could take or leave. But then it crept into other aspects of our lives. We started drinking while doing yard work, then while cleaning the basement, and eventually, to cope with the stresses of parenting. Before we knew it, drinking had become a regular part of our social life, our means of unwinding, our crutch.

Last summer, it got out of hand. We met new friends who loved to party, and we joined them wholeheartedly. Nights blurred into mornings, and we often found ourselves collapsing into bed as the birds began to chirp. The fights between my husband and me grew more frequent and more intense. I said and did things I regret deeply. Blackouts became common, and I often woke up feeling shame and self-loathing. My body bore the brunt of my drinking too—I was gaining weight, my skin was breaking out, and I had the worst hangovers. One of my lowest points was falling down the stairs with my son in my arms, or the times where I would pass out in my sons bed, realizing that I was repeating the same harmful patterns I experienced growing up was a wake-up call. I knew I had to break the cycle and create a healthier environment for my children.

Together in Sobriety

My husband and I decided to quit drinking together. We had tried before, managing a few months of sobriety each time, only to fall back into old habits. This time felt different. We were determined to do it for our kids, our relationship, and our health. Joining Facebook groups like “Sober Sisters” and “The Sober Mom Life” made a significant difference. Connecting with others who understood our struggle provided the support we needed. I also devoured sober audiobooks, learning that alcohol is literally a poison that hinders growth and healing.

Nine months into sobriety, the benefits are undeniable. I’ve lost weight and the persistent bloat that plagued me for years has vanished. My skin, once marred by breakouts and dullness, has cleared up, glowing with newfound health. My mental health has seen a dramatic improvement; the heavy fog of depression has lifted. While I still have days where I feel unmotivated or sad, those feelings no longer consume me. I feel hopeful and more present in my life, able to engage fully with my family and friends. I find joy in the small things I once overlooked—morning coffee, the laughter of my children, the colors of a sunset. I take time to appreciate the beauty around me and live more mindfully, savoring each moment. My relationships have grown stronger, built on clear communication and genuine connection rather than blurred by the haze of alcohol. Every day, I feel more in tune with myself and my surroundings, embracing a life of clarity and purpose that I never thought possible.

Sobriety saved my relationship with my husband. Without alcohol clouding our interactions, we’ve found new depths of communication and support. We’ve rediscovered how to talk without the liquid courage—or, more accurately, the liquid chaos—that once fueled our arguments. We’re breaking the cycle for our children, creating a stable, loving environment where bedtime isn’t a negotiation over who gets the last slice of pizza or who forgot to take out the trash. Instead, we’re focusing on what really matters: being present, engaged, and able to laugh at the everyday craziness of family life. Our house may not be a Pinterest-perfect paradise, but it’s filled with genuine conversations and heartfelt moments, and that’s worth more than any staged Instagram photo.

Authenticity Unfiltered

Some family members still don’t understand. They insist I’m not an alcoholic and claim I’m more fun when I’m drinking. Sure, I miss feeling carefree and open, but I know those feelings were fleeting and false. Drinking masked who I truly am—quiet, socially awkward, and a little weird. Sobriety has helped me embrace my true self.

Last summer, I was absent from my kids’ lives, lost in a haze of parties and alcohol. Now, I’m present, spending quality time with them and cherishing these moments. Today, instead of writing this with three shots of tequila in my system, I’m sipping coffee and feeling proud of how far I’ve come. Alcohol was my escape, but in reality, it was holding me back.

I know I can never have just one drink. For me, it’s never just one. It’s a slippery slope that leads to excess and regret. That’s why I’ve quit for good. If anyone out there is struggling with alcohol, I want you to know that I’m here to talk. Many people won’t be happy with me for speaking out, but it feels liberating to finally share my truth.

Helpful Resources

Sobriety has transformed my life in ways I never imagined. If you or someone you know is struggling with alcohol, know that support is available. Here are some valuable resources that can provide help and guidance on your journey:

– **Alcoholics Anonymous (AA)** – A worldwide fellowship offering support and a 12-step program for those seeking to overcome alcoholism.

– **National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA)** – Provides research-based information and resources on alcohol use and treatment options.

– **SMART Recovery** – An alternative to AA, SMART Recovery offers tools and support for self-empowerment in overcoming addiction.

– **Al-Anon Family Groups** – Offers support for families and friends of individuals struggling with alcoholism.

You don’t have to face this journey alone. There’s a whole community ready to support you, just as they supported me. Remember, every step towards sobriety is a step towards a brighter, healthier future.

In addition to seeking support from these resources, I found that incorporating certain supplements into my routine helped support my liver health during my sobriety journey. One key supplement I used was Milk Thistle. Milk thistle is well-known for its liver-protective properties. It contains silymarin, a compound that has antioxidant and anti-inflammatory effects, which can help repair liver cells and support overall liver function. It’s been used traditionally to aid liver detoxification and protect against liver damage.

Here are a few other supplements that may support liver health:

• N-Acetylcysteine (NAC): NAC is a powerful antioxidant that helps replenish levels of glutathione, a critical compound for detoxification and liver health. It can support the liver’s ability to neutralize harmful substances and reduce oxidative stress.
• Turmeric: Turmeric contains curcumin, which has potent anti-inflammatory and antioxidant properties. It can support liver health by reducing inflammation and aiding in the liver’s natural detoxification processes.
• Dandelion Root: Dandelion root is often used to support liver function and bile production. It can help with liver detoxification and promote healthy digestion. I actually drink the tea!
• Artichoke Extract: Artichoke extract is known to support liver health by enhancing bile production and flow, which helps in the digestion and absorption of fats. It also has antioxidant properties that protect liver cells.

Always consult with a healthcare provider before starting any new supplement regimen, especially if you have underlying health conditions or are taking other medications. These supplements, combined with a balanced diet and a healthy lifestyle, can play a supportive role in maintaining liver health as you embark on your journey of sobriety.

Together, we can break the cycle. Together, we can heal.